The scarcity of honesty in the modern world
i/me/myself will wood.
this is like the third song today that has just hit different and yes i have written about all of them.
so. in the song will discusses how he starved himself once which isnt a new story in his songs. But he relates this to how its typically something females do when they think they arent pretty enough even though they are already super pretty.
"i wish i could be a girl so that way you could wish i was your girlfriend, boyfriend" so initially i thought he was in love with a straight guy.
but in relation to what im feeling now. i have noticed that everyone i have had a crush on in the last 12 months is lesbian... im a guy. this is an odd situation i find myself in which i have discussed before just more abstract (im getting bored of abstracting things)
a thing to note with the common theme of where my crushes end up is that i also know the people well. i know that they are comfortable sharing information which in turn makes me comfortable sharing information. this is actually irritatingly uncommon in modern schools and the scarcity of mutual honesty and trust in conversation seems to make the times i do get it feel special, which over the course of months leads to an increased thinking of that particularly person which contributes to a romanticisation.
the past few days i have done a lot of these social analyical writing thought experiments.
i want to blame social media for all of it... hyperbole get clicks not honesty. if you say something embarrassing on tik tok people will bully you with it forever. if you open yourself up to vulnerability and new ideas then not only are you feeling uncomfortable, but online you are opening your vulnerable side up to a world of misinformation and hate. and all of this seeps into the real world, driven by the people fallen victim to the consequences of social media. But leaving it so normalised that people seem to have forgotten how to socialise.
i thought i was bad at socialising, but i am open.